Blizzard brain block
I’m sitting in the house snowed in for the 5th day in a row so you’d think I’d be pumping out blog posts like nobody’s business. But the snow has turned me into the worst kind of slacker. I’m getting waaay too used to sitting around getting paid to do absolutely nothing …My expectations for how much I feel like should be expected to do for each dollar per hour I make is starting to go down at about the same rate that the number of inches of snow outside is increasing. As a matter of fact a couple more days of this and there’s a good chance* I’ll have the following conversation with my supervisor the next time I’m in the office:
Supervisor: Any chance you’ll get this project finished by the end of the week?
Me (while blowing my freshly polished fingernails dry): Excuse me but I looked at my last pay statement and I was still getting paid at the sit on my butt and do nothing rate. I’ll need to see at least 30% increase if you expect me to actually complete assignments
Aside from the snowed in slackerism, I can’t really decide what I want to talk about. I’ve read about a lot of useless tomfoolery while I’ve been held hostage by the Snowtorious B.I.G., but I can’t seem to piece together a whole cohesive piece.
Blog posts Ive considered writing today include the following:
When a rapping roach goes to jail: My deep thoughts and reflections
Things I’ve learned from reading Sarah Palins hand
John Mayers racist penis and you
10 reasons Valentine’s Day makes my toenails itch
But all I’ve actually managed to accomplish today is beating my high score on Bejeweled and making a bomb Welch’s grape juice snow cone.
Perhaps if I someone chooses one of the potential topics I’ll feel compelled to write a post, if not I’ll go back to browsing through Twitter posts and maybe give myself a much needed pedicure. I actually might write the Valentines day post if I can convince myself there’s a good reason not to pretend it doesn’t exist entirely.
*By good chance I mean not a chance in Hades…I still enjoy receiving my paycheck on schedule every two weeks